Dressed to Kill

Poncho Honcho

2010-06-08T14:40:00.004+08:00

There must be a reason why Betty in the "Ugly Betty" series is ridiculed for her dress sense at Mode.

It could obviously be because she turned up for her first day at work dressed as below...

But no matter how hideous that outfit seems, there are people that still don't hesitate to emulate that trend 3652 miles away from New York City, USA, in Amsterdam, Netherlands.

Seen in the shops of Bijenkorf on a Saturday afternoon, whilst the weather was still slightly chilly, and did call for layers of clothing... this was spied...

29th May 2010: Even the salesgirl is speechless. De Bijenkorf, Amsterdam, Netherlands

Typically, i would highlight what was disastrous, but then again, the whole outfit is... just like from the television series, i thought i'd leave it intact... bag, shoes, poncho, hair and ALL.

Forever Young

2009-06-07T13:16:00.011+08:00

Editor's Update: Its been a good four months since i've opened up Photoshop for any editing. With a brand new focus in life... look out for pictures in the future depicting not only mish-mashed Singaporeans, but foreign "delights"!

For the best effect, it is recommended that this youtube video is played while you are reading the following entry...

As age "catches up" with me, i realise that there are certain hairstyles, hem lines, outfits and even behaviour that simply does not sit well with the entire package.

I can also understand why my mother picks out brightly coloured clothing with lace trims and the likes which exudes girlish delight.

Often, changing how one looks or dresses would be the easiest or quickest way out if people are in denial.

though, it might not be the most painless way out for people that turn to "professional help" - botox, facelifts, implants. and the following prove why "professional help" isn't always the best best way out.

1. Janet Jackson and Vivica Fox

Looks like they share the same plastic surgeon with the same dent in the right boob

2. Melanie Griffith Before and After

and she is only in her 50s

3. What about Tranny-Spice... oops.. i mean Scary-Spice.

~Picture from Awful Plastic Surgery

Other bad decisions in life include...

24th February 2009: In a store at Millenia Walk... PRINCESS?!

7th February 2009: In a store at Milennia - heading for kindergarten classes after?

or even when you are at an age when youthful elements in dressing are forgiveable... too much of a good thing can often backfire.

15th February 2009: At Tanah Merah MRT

Perhaps maturing gracefully and naturally is never an option for some, but dressing and behaving all "cutsey-pie" can be awfully off-putting.

All hail to nails

2009-02-09T22:37:00.007+08:00

it is not difficult to understand why some women look up to Empress Ci Xi since she was the de facto ruler of the Manchu Qing Dynasty for 48 years.

Empress Dowager Cixi

yet when some women attempt to emulate her in terms of her style which dates back to the late 1800s... (read: ancient)...

or taking a leaf out of traditional Thai dancers...

The Dance of the Long Nails

it can be both frustrating and just plain scary...

photo taken by Shoppingholic at the taxi stand of Vivocity on 4th February 2009

at first glance, this was just a really bad choice of an attire.

with an overly pink trench coat and brown suede boots.

but when i got closer and realised that she could not keep her hands of her man-friend, i could not resist.

photo taken by Shoppingholic at the taxi stand of Vivocity on 4th February 2009

i could not figure out what the red long sleeved thing with that pink bow was about... as well as the gold bag that had a bear dangling from the bag as an accessory.

and she had nails to match her outfit...

nails at a length which could spell bad hygiene and championing at cat fights.

but long fingernails can be a fashion statement, and something that i can understand if not for the nail art that is applied.

long toenails on the other hand... (with pun completely intended)

photo taken by the-smelly-one during lunch at Still Road on 2nd February 2009

the only conclusion that i can draw from this is that she either doesn't exercise or just does yoga or pilates.

because i can not imagine the pain of wearing sneakers on the treadmill with those nails.

underwear is meant to be worn UNDERNEATH

2009-01-29T14:16:00.007+08:00

it just seems that women in singapore are adamant on displaying their intimate apparel to full glory.

following the revealing outfits of previous entries of...

auntie and intimates

wearing the wrong bra by Gigi Ang

its astonishing what outfits some people can come up with to show what undies they wear.

photo by the-smelly-one at Spinelli's of Heeren on 12th January 2009

despite carrying a limited edition Louis Vuitton bag, which i'd have to admit was pretty much of a disaster despite the price tag.

i'm not sure why you would want the world to know that you are wearing a red bra.

oh... maybe that was the entire point?

*TSK#

or how, you want people to know you are wearing undies with granma lace?

photo by Shoppingholic at border's bistro on 28th January 2009

though nothing quite beats what was witnessed on the first day of Chinese New Year.

photo by the-smelly-one at the Night Safari on 26th January 2009

yes... we were at the Night Safari.

i do not understand why anyone would wear an outfit like that to a tourist attraction where mild trekking or extensive walking is involved.

at first the only thing that caught my eye was the dress falling off her back and revealing her very unflattering white strapless bra.

when i uploaded the picture on photoshop...

i was aghast to realise that the outfit had asymetrical tails that revealed that lace pattern of her dress.... and her skin...

*gags#

then there was the anklet which i believe should only be worn by babies...

and the transparent bra straps that are showing and holding up the bra.

*blinks in disbelief#

she looked like she was dressed for some wedding dinner party.

i didn't know that there were animals getting married at the Night Safari.

Hairy Expectations

2009-01-25T17:34:00.022+08:00

pet owners sometimes do horrendous and extremely inexcusable things to their pets...

~photo by Daniel A. Anderson

In 2006, Sandra Hartness decided to groom her poodle, Cindy, into a peacock at a grooming competition.

and the following year... a ninja turtle that she decided to name "Leonardoodle".

~photo by Barcroft

or this creation when Cindy was transformed into a... CHICKEN?!

~photo by Barcroft

or in 2005 as a... dragon?

~photo by Barcroft

i sternly believe that pet owners that subject their pets to any unnecessary colouring of any sort should just try it on themselves and see how it feels!

maybe this explains why the subject below was seen with her hair colour such a terrifying shade of blonde and with a haircut distinct of a breed standard of a poodle.

seen on the mrt by shoppingholic on 18th January 2008

yet, honestly... it is not an excuse to turn up on the streets honestly looking like a poodle.

~photo by pip of probe in the arse of society

or not understand that when you have coloured your hair, and when your true colours have taken over your hairstyle, you know its time to book an appointment with your hair stylists.

taken by shoppingholic on the way to work on #195 on 22nd January 2008

also mary poppins was popular in 2 decades back... she wore a hat constantly and was stylish and fashionable...

~picture from The Journey

and most importantly, because the hat fit her head because when it doesn't... you end up looking like this...

taken by shoppingholic on the streets outside heeren on 12th January 2008

and last but not least... and ofcourse i understand that temperatures can be unbearable in singapore, and that is why i tie my long tresses up... but when a MAN with hairs that have the length probably equivalent to that of his pits, ties his hair up... it is honestly just beyond me.

spotted by shoppingholic along the streets outside heeren on 12th January 2008

simply because during chinese new year... he simply reminds me of this...

the young lads that signify wealth and prosperity

and on that note to all the readers out there...

a very happy chinese new year with best wishes of good health and great wealth.

Mambo Jambo

2009-01-12T20:38:00.012+08:00

there is a reason why zouk has mambo jambo nights on wednesdays ONLY.

like music, past memories can be nostalgic and bring back fond memories, but some things should best be left in the past.

leg warmers once so popular in the 80s, for example, are worn in winter...

Milla Jovovich and Katie Price

because even the above celebrities can't exactly pull it off without looking dowdy.

so why does one think that it should be worn in Singapore?!

for it definitely wasn't cold that night along the streets outside of Heeren on the 10th January 2009.

but even so... leg warmers are the least of my concerns with the ever increasing salah (read: Erroneous, incorrect, wrong) matching of knee high socks and stockings seen on the streets.

i do think knee high socks are fine...

when worn by high school kids as part of their ~~fashion statements~~ uniforms, and when women are playing soccer...

during a Beijing 2008 Olympics Group F Women's first round soccer match

but not as part of everyday shopping attire!

especially if you are over the age of 30, and shopping in zara at Ngee Ann City ... with a lilac coloured hello kitty tote bag!

and can anyone tell me what is with the flower-power of a dress?!

perhaps that is why she was shopping for an outfit?

but the icing topped my cake today when i ventured further down the streets as i spotted a black, white and denim ensemble that reminded me so much of the encounter at city plaza.

as seen along the streets further down orchard road outside OG, 12th January 2008

no wonder that outfit has distressed minnie.

If Katherine Mcphee couldn't pull it off, what makes anyone think they could?!

with legs wiiiiiiiiide open

2009-01-07T11:35:00.009+08:00

coming from an all girls' school at one point of my life, the girls in school were frequently reminded that they should sit with their legs closed even if they were wearing shorts when in the canteen.

i only realised very much later in life that people are always looking, when you very least expect them to.

these days i would not hesitate to cringe at...

the mere sight of men and women sitting with one leg shaking to high heavens.
how women didn't seem to think that bushy armpits would be something that should not be displayed so unconditionally in sleeveless tops.
passers-by that seem to be oblivious that the entire world is watching as they dig their noses.

image from Two Pork Rolls

men AND women squating by the roadside as if one is about to relieve oneself.

captured by the-smelly-one along the streets of geylang on christmas eve 2008

women tweezing eyebrows and facial hairs in public as i witnessed at the cafe of Ikea in Beijing a few years ago and was completely aghast.

and the list goes on...

so imagine my horror when i came across the following yesterday along the walkways between Takashimaya and Wisma Atria.

bunched up ankle high stockings that were not the same skin tone, and white bra straps that screamed at me beneath her bright red chilli spaghetti top, and she was wearing lip colour that matched her top.

but the best has yet to come...

i had to will every single cell in my body not to burst out laughing when the following ensued.

having to be discreet as i was directly opposite her, i had to use my phone camera and pretend to be smsing whilst she proceeded to take off her stockings in full view of everyone, whilst her companion proceeded to either pluck her eyebrows or draw them.

next she massaged her feet and took out her nail clipper for her exhibitionistic single footed pedicure, and her partner carried on to the next eyebrow.

and having attained relief from the foot massage and the single footed express pedicure, she put her stocking back on and went on to air it.

and throughout the entire half hour, she and her companions seemed to be screaming at each other in conversation.

it was as if there was a fight that would ensue, and i just simply did not understand the necessity to talk at that volume because they were just next to each other.

*rolls eyes#

i'm sure other things could be worse... what are your experiences?

baby... its COLD outside?!?!?!?!

2009-01-06T10:00:00.007+08:00

yearly, when i made my way back to singapore for my year-end holidays, i would gag and gape at the women here that seemed to think that 25 to 35 degrees celsius temperatures warranted winter raiments.

maybe because of the christmas decorations in singapore that cause delusions of wintry climates?

~photo from sparklette

or the christmas jingles like that of below, that have now been replaced by chinese new year ching-chong-chiang?

i remember when i still used to live in beijing, towards the end of the year when the northern hemisphere starts to freeze over, the winter garb would make its way on my racks, and how even though i really adore winter getups, in those frosty temperatures they really do serve a functional purpose.

back in Singapore, on an average, when December hits, the temperatures are decisively lower than that in June... and it might even be forgivable when thick bomber jackets and trench coats are worn in the offices when the air-conditioning can be icy...

but when i encountered the following... i really wasn't quite sure...

~photo by blowfish, 5th January 2009

the dress itself baffles me. it seems to have came with a ragged dishcloth of a scarf.

and even though the colour combination is as simple as it could get, the tree trunks on the border of the dress bottom seems to have extended beyond into her legs as exhibited by the opaque leggings and black boots.

for the not so colour co-ordinated, the following definitely caught my attention...

the fried hair, tight denim 2-piece, saggy triceps, chequered stockings & white mid-calf boots.

i kick myself for not getting a clearer shot as i was leaving city plaza on the 4th January 2009, with temperatures which i believed averaged 30 degrees in the evening.

i wasn't sure if i was baffled by her boldness at her age which i estimated to be in her late thirties to mid-forties, to be in this attire, until my friend nudged me and told me that we were very near geylang, the undisputed red light district in Singapore.

and how when i showed the-smelly-one the next picture, the-smelly-one immediately remarked, "she looks like curtains on legs".

showing bra straps, unflattering dress, mid-calves boots

i would have to say the dress and revealing bra straps spoilt everything, and she looked really stumpy even though she does look like she has really nice legs.

or the following "girls" in the following apparel and were making their way into a particular chicken rice restaurant along River Valley.

~photo by the-smelly-one, 4th January 2009

those boots above would be perfectly gorgeous perhaps in New York or Shanghai now, but even as an avid boots lover myself with over 10 pairs in my collection, i could not even dare to imagine wearing mine in this humid and hot climate.

and what was up with the whole hoodie and boots assemble on a warm, balmy evening? some sort of uniform perhaps?

so remember baby, in Singapore... it is CERTAINLY NOT COLD OUTSIDE!

nothing else brings out the animal in you

2009-01-03T10:19:00.011+08:00

i love animal prints.

in small doses, they can add that wild, mysterious and savage touch.

Christian Louboutin "Rolando leopard print" Pumps

Balloons for that Safari Theme Party

"Wild" nights in the comfort of your own bedroom with these sheets

Apt fashion statement if you're visiting South Africa

Roberto Cavalli Grand Tour Shoulder Bag

Add a stylish accessory to your look

but pity that they sometimes can draw some unnecessary attention, and not everyone can pull off a stunt like the following even if it is from Just Cavalli.

Cotton Chimaera Print Scalloped T-Shirt by Just cavalli

its one of those instances when the below comes to mind...

photo from Metropol 21 on flickr

and before the end of 2008, my friends and i decided to head for people ~~haunting~~ watching after a sumptuous dinner.

and along the way from Wheelock Place to the sidewalk cafe of Scotts Road, we were close on the heels of the following...

honestly, i wasn't quite sure what to look at first.

1. the asymmetrical bottom of the dress with the awful print which looked like it was shredded at the bottom to pieces?

OR

2. the grey leopard print bag that looked completely out of place in the whole getup?

OR

3. the flower in her very long hair which i suspect she has to tie up everytime she visits the toilet?

what is your take on it?

sometimes, you don't want to be "seen-through"

2009-01-02T08:11:00.015+08:00

i often associate lace with...

victorian lace umbrellas

New Victoria's Secrets Embrace Push Up Bra

Lace Tablecoths

Vintage: 1930's Chanel Couture Slik, Lace, Tulle Dress

Wedding Gowns: Seen here, Battenberg Lace

Heirloom Inspirations

and when in the right and appropriate doses and proportions, it could add a sense of allure, sweetness or cheekiness.

but not everyone gets it right all the time... ... ...

according to the creator of this article of clothing, it is the *cough cough# "perfect summer cardigan".

Along the streets of Tokyo, the above attire(s) can be often sighted... but Lolita... Lolita... Halloween only happens once a year.

and on our very own shores in Singapore... lace is often seen adorned by middle-aged women that go for the "peek-a-boo look" which i do not understand... ... ...

at a dessert stall in Chinatown, 29th December 2008, photo by the-smelly-one

if you looked really carefully, the camisole underneath the lace blouse actually has frills on it!

along the underpass of Orchard MRT, 30th December 2008

when i was editing the photos to highlight the assemble, the very mismatched accessories on the lady in white which jumped out at me.

2 for the price of one photo!

*claps hands in glee#

but we shall concentrate on the above middle-aged lady that decided to rome the streets of Orchard Road in a bright... BRIGHT... pink frilly dress, that is worn underneath an extremely tight lacey dress.

the photo doesn't quite do her justice, because if she was right infront of one, one would have no choice but to simply notice how HUGE her ass was because of the accentuated pom-pom effect of the pink bottom.

so ladies... remember that mixing and matching in these hard economic times can completely maximise the potentials of each garment, but honestly... there can be a very thin line which can be crossed over easily, for more often than not, eclectic could come across as completely eccentric.

the rest of the entries in the blog are of amazing wow-factor, but for just one entry with lace... she ended up completely mismatched.

Peek-a-BRAaaaaaARGH!

2008-12-31T10:26:00.012+08:00

its somewhat of a consolation when celebrities themselves make fashion mistakes.

sometimes, i wonder what their stylists were even thinking!

especially when bra straps and bra parts are on full display, because its one thing when celebrities assemble their own outfits... and another when they are on the red carpet!

~photos above from dailymail

and what can one say when the bra in speaking is completely granny-like and should be retired?!

~photo from Los Angeles Times Blogs

so what even if Victoria Beckham attends Victoria Secrets fashion shows? obviously she doesn't think about wearing THEIR undergarments.

although honestly, i wouldn't be sure that any bra could do that ugly outfit justice.

and sometimes, lingerie is designed so that it serves its basic purpose, it supports, and some bras actually do that job without all the extra strings and tassels like below.

~photo of nubra from FaKeera's World

so that they do not end up looking like this.... at the most unexpected moments!

~photo by Gigi Ang at a wedding dinner at Fort Canning in Nov 08

but i was absolutely flabbergasted when an auntie strutted along the pavements of Shaw Centre last night and took the peek-a-braARGH look to new heights last night in the following assemble...

she was out on a night with husband and daughter in tow.

HUSBANDS!

there is a difference between being blind and being chauvinistic and not allowing your partners to leave the house in skimpy outfits, and this outfit was just downright skanky when viewed from the front.

women above 35 should take a cue from JK Rowling to cover up when one overexposes.

~photo from Metro

humility is an important virtue regardless of your age or in whichever age...

Speaking of which, with 2009 just around the corner, have a smashing fashion-faux-pas free year ahead!

the new VPL: no longer the visible panty-line.. but the "Visible PantyLiner"

2008-12-29T16:43:00.011+08:00

its good to know that worldwide... women share common fashion mistakes.

thats because sometimes, a beautiful dresser mirror doesn't reflect all.

because sometimes, you only see things at face value.

dresser availabe from Ikea at SGD598

thus its not difficult to understand why the world infront of you can look like the pictures below when women leave their homes without checking their backsides out.

photo from fashion nette-work

and that is why, it is highly recommended that all households should have at least ONE full length mirror at home, especially helpful if just beside the main door.

and you thought that mirrors besides doors because of fengshui was blah~!

but sometimes.... just sometimes... even a mirror by the door is not much of help.

seemingly nothing wrong?

if a dog was a man's best friend, then sanitary napkins, pantyliners and tampons are a woman's.

and its important to know that pantyliners exist in all shapes and sizes including the following...

because if you're not careful... wearing a really short skirt and displaying your butt cheeks and/or granny panties will be the least of your concerns.

~photo by the-smelly-one

and this is something that a full length mirror can not detect.

A Spectral Coloured Being

2008-12-27T12:45:00.006+08:00

whenever i traveled, i had always been envious of travellers that were dressed up to the nines and were completely comfortable with their gear... but more so with their matching suitcases that came in an array of sizes.

Especially when i would be in Europe, i would be completely green-eyed when suitcases arrive on the conveyor belt and were handled by porters that looked like this...

Marc Jacobs for Louis Vuitton Luggage, blissfully monogram free.
Three suitcases, a steamer trunk, keepall, reporter satchel & briefcase.

i believe with expertise of the above, the elite wouldn't have to go through the hassle of mixing and matching... because style and colour doesn't come naturally to everyone easily.

and thats why everyone... and i mean everyone... should go through life at some point and take up lessons pertaining to below...

or risk ending up looking like this...

pink leggings and pink shoes, pink bag, pink beret!!!

whatever was the poor girl PthINKING?

not everyone can be Paris Hilton.

and even she makes mistakes a lot of times.

Converses do not go with fishnet stockings

2008-12-26T08:01:00.002+08:00

Most people would have owned a pair of Converses at some point in their lives.

A few of us might still own a pair.

But that being said, the casual look does not do everyone justice... and just because...

does not mean that you should end up wandering the streets dressed as below!!!!

the "peekaboo" shorts beneath that long safari shirt,

the sneakers with fishnet stockings, and a brown shoulder sling.

i am still not quite sure what to make of improvisations of Harujuku fashions on the sidewalks outside of Heeren.